Anxiety Before Grief Tending is Normal

16 Feb Anxiety Before Grief Tending is Normal

I’m paying attention to the invitations that come my way, and am saying “Yes” to some of the ones that in the past would have scared me. Now I am observing a little tingle and taking a risk.

I’m expanding my stretch zone. It’s also known as the ‘magic’ zone. It’s the territory we invite participants to step into during our workshops. With practice, our stretch zone becomes more comfortable and grows. It is a place where our learning can take place at a manageable pace.

Anxiety is often one of the natural responses as part of the grief experience. However, if the events we offer seem too far out of your comfort zone to contemplate, it might be helpful to know that staying in your comfort zone is an option. Even if you choose to join one of our workshops, everything we invite people to do is optional.

In a Grief Tending workshop we definitely don’t want people to leap beyond their stretch into their terror zone. When things are terrifying it’s probably not going to allow your nervous system to engage and process in a helpful way. But if there’s a tinge of nervousness or excitement, maybe now is the moment to take one step out of your comfort zone and try something new.

Once someone has booked to come to a workshop, anxiety can build. It is not unusual for all kinds of imagined scenarios to unfold, and feelings to surface. People often report physical symptoms or tensions increasing in the days beforehand. Many people feel worried about the concept of speaking in front of a group. Although we offer many different kinds of exercises and only some of them may include speaking.

If your ‘Worry Monster’ is activated, it can be helpful to find out more about what will be involved, or the style of facilitation. If there is something specific that you need, or are concerned about, it’ a great idea to ask. Often people need to know that they can take care of their own needs in the environment, and a bit more information can help to settle their nerves. If you are contemplating coming to one of our workshops, I recommend watching the video ‘What Happens in a Grief Tending Workshop?’

For Grief Tending workshops and events coming up, please see here.

Sarah Pletts is a Grief Tender and Artist who offers workshops in London and online, sharing rituals where grief on all themes is welcome.  For more information about Grief Tending events see here.